Live Better Letters: Navigating Menopause
By Juliet Rogers
Dear Hot and Moody,
Menopause is no joke. And when menopause hit me, I didn’t even see it coming.
At the time, I was, quite literally and figuratively, killing myself with work. A full-blown workaholic, I was not only clocking 80 to 100 hours a week, but I was running on stress and caffeine…along with a side of denial. My “self-care” strategy? I would eat whatever I wanted, without giving any thought to whether it was healthy, and I drank just enough to blur the chaos. Physically, I was in the worst shape of my life. I had sky-high blood pressure that landed me in the ER more times than I care to admit, and I was struggling with chronic back and knee pain. I was exhausted, anxious, short-fused, and just plain miserable.
And the worst part? I couldn’t even explain why I was miserable. I couldn’t sleep. I was freezing cold one second and sweating the next. I was snippy, agitated, and emotional. I am sure that I wasn’t a lot of fun to be around. Menopause had crept up on me like that old story of the frog in the pot –slow boil-style. You know the one: if you drop a frog into boiling water, it will jump right out. But if you put the frog in cool water, and you slowly turn up the heat, it won’t realize that it’s cooking until it’s too late. That was me…as I simmered in hormonal hell.
I was spiraling while I tried to figure out what might help. From hospital visits, to hormone shots, to weird pills that made me feel like I could vibrate through walls, I tried everything. EVERYTHING. And don’t get me started on all of the “advice” from every friend, doctor, blog, and stranger on Tik Tok.
However, one day, I finally hit my limit. I was done. I was done with feeling like garbage and snapping at my loved ones. Menopause had come at me like a hormonal Mack truck, and although I didn’t want to face myself in the mirror and admit that I had to change, menopause was here to stay.
So…what did I do?
Establishing a Healthy Diet:
First, I made a decision. Even though I didn’t fully understand that I was in menopause yet, I knew that I couldn’t keep living like I had been. I needed radical change. So I overhauled how I ate. I started to eat real food with real nutrients, and I changed my mindset about how I chose to fuel my body. I tried to choose the healthiest food options available, and if I knew that I wouldn’t have access to healthy food, I ate beforehand, or I brought my own food with me. I drank lots of water; I cut out soda, sugar, processed junk, and fried foods; and I just ate more healthily.
And guess what? My body started to shift. I had more energy, and my blood pressure dropped. My back stopped screaming. My night sweats calmed down. My mood lifted, and I was finally sleeping again. I felt human.
Giving Sobriety a Try:
At the same time, I decided to quit drinking. Initially, my sobriety was temporary. I had decided to stop drinking for a little reset. However, one month quickly turned into two…then six, and then ten. One day, I looked up and realized that I hadn’t had a drink in a year, and I felt amazing. That one decision changed everything.
This summer, I’ll be celebrating three years sober, and it’s the best feeling that I’ve ever had. I’m not going to lie –in the beginning, it was tough. But now, I’ll never go back, and I honestly don’t miss drinking at all. Being healthy feels so good.
Incorporating Yoga into My Routine:
I also began to practice yoga. First, my yoga practice started with a few stretches in my living room. Next, I started to attend yoga classes at different locations until I found a local studio that felt like it was the right fit. Once I found that studio, I dove in –not just in terms of movement (asana), but also in terms of yoga philosophy, breathwork, meditation and mindfulness. My entire life started to shift. I was calmer, kinder, and more authentically me.
How Incremental Changes Led to the “Live Better Challenge”
Let me tell you that none of these changes happened overnight. I made a series of small decisions (i.e. eat better, move my body more, and ditch the junk (literal and emotional)), and slowly, I was able to get myself back. In fact, this version of myself was actually better, as I felt healthier and happier.
After living more healthily for two years, I realized that I was on to something. I had just finished reading the book Atomic Habits, and the author’s suggestion of making tiny but powerful tweaks in our lives, is a concept that stuck with me.
Additionally, my friends and family had certainly noticed the positive changes in my life as a result of the practices that I had implemented, and they started asking me about the work that I had done.
What began as contemplating the content in Atomic Habits and helping a few people to make better food choices, quickly turned into something that is so much bigger, as the “Live Better Challenge” was born. I created this challenge to help individuals to make small, sustainable changes that can lead them to radically better lives. This challenge isn’t about being perfect; it’s about making progress in the right direction —one step at a time!
Here’s what I know for sure: every single choice that we make matters –whether it’s…
what we eat,
what we drink,
what thoughts we let in, or
what people we allow in our inner circles.
Good energy attracts good energy. And bad energy? Well… you know how that goes!
Now, am I perfect? Please. No way. I will still eat unhealthy food for special occasions or skip yoga (like that one month that I was “too busy” planning my daughter’s wedding, and I threw my back out (true story)). But every time that I fall away from my healthy habits, I can feel it. My body reminds me about why I started these practices in the first place.
So here’s your tough-love moment: Menopause is happening. You don’t get to opt out. But you do get to choose how you move through it.
Consider asking yourself the following questions:
How am I fueling my body?
Does what I eat and drink help or hurt my hormones?
Am I moving my body enough?
Am I surrounding myself with good, positive energy?
Am I giving myself rest, nourishment, and grace?
When all is said and done
Make the change. No, there isn’t a quick fix when it comes to menopause. And yes, we live in an “Amazon Prime” culture where we want results yesterday. But real, lasting wellness doesn’t come in a pill, a shot, or a fad. Believe me, I’ve tried! Change comes when we make daily choices that benefit our health.
It is also important to know that most doctors aren’t trained in nutrition or healthy habits. They’re trained to diagnose, prescribe, and operate. That’s not a dig; that’s just reality. That’s their lane. If you want to get well, find people who focus on wellness instead of illness.
Start with you!
“Kriya Yoga,” or the yoga of action, is built on three things: discipline, self-reflection, and trust. It is through these practices that I crawled my way out of my own mess. I made tiny decisions, and I had honest check-ins with myself. I placed my trust in the fact that all of the little changes would add up…even when I couldn’t see it yet.
Ask yourself, “How do I want to feel?” Then start making choices: small ones, bold ones, and daily ones that move you in your desired direction. As Maya Angelou so brilliantly said, “When you know better, do better.” And now? You know better. So let’s start doing better: one breath, one bite, and one brave decision at a time!
Yes, this is tough love. But I promise you that it’s worth it. And once you choose to live better, you’ll look back and wonder, Why did I wait so long? Your future self will thank you for living better today!
With love and wellness,
Juliet
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Send your questions for “Live Better Letters” to Juliet at julietrogerslivebetter@gmail.com!The Mindful Life Magazine is created by the Mindful Life Practice. We publish the writing of our community members from our retreats, trainings, and online programs. If you want to learn more about what we do, check out www.themindfullifepractice.com !
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